i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
