Just cropdusted the office
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
