No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize
