I want to stick my p in your. b.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
