I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
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Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
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Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???