Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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