Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
