We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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