guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
