doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Where is the hickey?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
