so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize