Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
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