I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
