We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
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She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
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apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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