Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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