Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
