Texts From Last Night

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  (817): View more from Texas

  If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.

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  (817): If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral. http://tfl.nu/qqbj
  Replies (13) Good night (3018) Bad night (532) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.

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  (805): He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him. http://tfl.nu/fsan
  Replies (31) Good night (4753) Bad night (1134) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot

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  (480): I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot http://tfl.nu/rl8p
  Replies (87) Good night (10901) Bad night (635) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.

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  (954): We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver. http://tfl.nu/zvig
  Replies (16) Good night (3960) Bad night (1152) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.

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  (904): This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them. http://tfl.nu/3ylo
  Replies (5) Good night (2142) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.

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  (307): this is worse than the time i threw up a condom. http://tfl.nu/98sx
  Replies (15) Good night (736) Bad night (4796) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.

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  (615): Please high five our old drug dealer for me please. http://tfl.nu/fpo5
  Replies (2) Good night (1522) Bad night (545) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts

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  (623): Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts http://tfl.nu/oqnb
  Replies (8) Good night (1949) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off

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  (914): Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off http://tfl.nu/fxgn
  Replies (8) Good night (1169) Bad night (439) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...

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  (+61): For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up... http://tfl.nu/ld08
  Replies (0) Good night (402) Bad night (803) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom

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  (919): Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom http://tfl.nu/af7u
  Replies (5) Good night (1448) Bad night (271) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away

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  (419): I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away http://tfl.nu/9ufh
  Replies (1) Good night (438) Bad night (793)
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  (308): View more from Nebraska

  In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.

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  (308): In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge. http://tfl.nu/2ycl
  Replies (22) Good night (1351) Bad night (506)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.

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  (540): You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you. http://tfl.nu/4u5p
  Replies (6) Good night (1783) Bad night (391) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.

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  (407): I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again. http://tfl.nu/tkx0
  Replies (2) Good night (183) Bad night (394) Order T-Shirt

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