You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
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