I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
