Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
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