would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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