You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
