You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
