I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
