I feel like I'm in dance class right now
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
