My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
