You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
be right there i have to get my cape
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
