Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Randomize