I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
This house was built for laser tag.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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