I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.