Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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