I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
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I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
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I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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