Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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