i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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