would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
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The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
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I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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