She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
