it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
