shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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