Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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