is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize