How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
