big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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