shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Rumble strips road head = magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize