My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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