yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
