It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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