Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
