butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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