I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
i've created a new STD.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
