I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
