I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
cat food counts as protein by the way
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
