I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
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