ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
