i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
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now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
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I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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